Goal feats, upsets and a career nadir
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The net-rippling expertise of one No7 and two No11s highlights FIFA.com’s latest stats review, along with some stunning surprises in UEFA competitions and a disastrous two minutes for one man in Norway.

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goals in 137 games is what Miroslav Klose ended his Germany tenure with this week as the joint-sixth leading marksmen in international football history. Only Ali Daei (109 in 149), Ferenc Puskas (84 in 89), Pele (77 in 91), Sandor Kocsis (75 in 68) and Bashar Abdullah (75 in 133) outrank the Poland-born 36-year-old. Klose’s decision also means that, of the 19 retired Germans to have posted 20 or more international goals, an impressive 12 have scored more than a goal every other game: Klose (0.52), Gerd Muller (1.10), Rudi Voller (0.52), Uwe Seeler (0.60), Oliver Bierhoff (0.53), Fritz Walter (0.54), Klaus Fischer (0.71), Edmund Conen (0.96), Max Morlock (0.81), Helmut Rahn (0.53), Richard Hofmann (0.87), and Karl Hohmann (0.80). Klose, who was on target on his Germany debut in 2001 and recently outstripped Brazilian Ronaldo as the all-time highest scorer in FIFA World Cup™ history, is the international game’s top marksman this century, six clear of Didier Drogba.

14

major European trophies have now been seized by Real Madrid following their UEFA Super Cup victory over Sevilla on Tuesday, tieing AC Milan’s record. The pair are followed by Barcelona (12) and Liverpool (11). Cristiano Ronaldo’s brace inspired the 2-0 win in Cardiff, meaning he has now scored in all four single-game finals he’s played for Los Merengues. That the Portuguese was on target against Sevilla came as little surprise, however, given that he has scored more goals against them in La Liga (16) than any other team. The attendance of 30,854 was a record for a single-match UEFA Super Cup, while five of its past six winners have now been Spanish.

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successive defeats, with 103 goals conceded in the process: that was Albanian sides’ record in UEFA Women’s Champions League competition until KS Vllaznia stopped the rot with two widely unforeseen results. The Shkoder club’s only previous participation came in 2011/12, when they lost 16-0, 8-0 and 10-0, but they got their qualifying-round campaign off to a flying start with a Suada Jashari-inspired 2-1 win over Klaksvikar Itrottarfelag. Vllaznia followed that up with a goalless draw against Group 6 leaders Apollon Limassol, leaving them on the verge of the most unlikely of spots in the Round of 16.

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goals was the margin by which Zenit thrashed Torpedo Moscow to equal their biggest win in Russian Premier League history on Saturday. Hulk, who created a staggering 12 one-on-one opportunities during the game, and Jose Rondon both hit braces before the Brazil international was replaced by Aleksandr Kerzhakov just before the hour. The 31-year-old former Sevilla striker then hit a double of his own to complete an 8-1 victory and become the St. Petersburg outfit’s all-time leading marksman on 160 goals from 351 matches. Venezuela-born Portuguese playmaker Danny was the only man to appear the club’s defeat of Luch-Energiya by the same scoreline in 2008. The result sent Andre Villas-Boas’ side top of the division, on maximum points from two outings.

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minutes: that is the time in which Vegard Forren missed a penalty and scored an own-goal as Molde suffered a last-gasp collapse from the cusp of a UEFA Europa League play-off place to elimination by Zorya. The Norwegians drew 1-1 in Ukraine and, in front of their own fans, seemed destined to complete a deserved 3-2 aggregate victory when Forren stepped up to the spot on 87 minutes. The Norway international’s penalty was superbly saved by promising 21-year-old Mykyta Shevchenko, though, and Forren’s misery was compounded when he put through his own net merely seconds of open play later. Meanwhile Icelandic minnows Starjan drew 0-0 away to Lech Poznan, thus completing a 1-0 aggregate victory in one of the biggest upsets in recent seasons. The lowest-ranked side in the competition now face arguably its most famous, Inter Milan, in the play-off round. "This has been an insane experience for us,” said Starjan striker Veigar Pall Gunnarsson, “and now we are going to play at the San Siro!”